New Mum on the Blog

Sharing is Caring! Experiences, insights, advice and tips from one mum to another

I hate to break it to ya…

on August 17, 2012

When Jon and I found out we were pregnant it was a day of mixed emotion. Although we were over the moon about having a little baby boy or girl, a million questions ran through my head. Are we ready? Do we need to get married? Can we really raise a child at this point in our lives? Am I ready to have a baby? I did always know I wanted to be a mom, I did always know that one day I would have a big family and since meeting Jon almost 5 years ago I knew it would be with him. But like any relationship we had our ups and downs. Little did I know the 9ish months I would be growing our little baby girl in my belly would be the same year Jon and I went through some of the hardest part of our relationship.

I thought that we would be the happiest couple in the world and that we would be in total bliss while I was pregnant. Yes, we were so excited to have her, and yes we knew this was what we wanted but for some reason I felt alone, I felt like he didn’t share the same emotions as I did, that he didn’t understand what I was going through, how I felt. Notice the word “I.” Of course I was being selfish in my feelings, why wouldn’t I be. I was the one who was pregnant, I was the one who had to worry about perfectly growing our little girl, not him. He didn’t get it. Come on, I can’t be the only one who felt this way.

My pregnancy was pretty textbook, morning sickness, back aches, headaches, moody, crampy, tired, up, down, up, down. My relationship was suffering; we weren’t talking much or really spending any time together, supporting each other. We were together but not present for each other. We were fighting more than ever, I would of rather snuggled with my Snoogle pillow then him and he slept on the couch almost every night towards the end of our pregnancy. Don’t get me wrong, there were days where all I wanted to do was be with him, talk to him, let him know I love him, but I didn’t. I didn’t think I had too. I assumed that he knew how I was feeling, that he knew I was a huge, and I mean huge, ball of mixed emotion. Can’t every boyfriend read minds?

The last month of my pregnancy we were getting better, we were both getting so excited to meet our little girl that all we could talk about was what it will be like when was here, what she would be like, who she would look like. Then the time came. On October 7, 2011 at 9:38 p.m. Audrina had arrived! She was beautiful, just perfect. We both were filled with so much love and emotion, I really can’t explain the feeling. She was here and it was perfect. My little family.

This last year I’m not going to say was perfect, our relationship definitely had its up’s and down. In the 5 years we have been together I think we have been through what a couple would go through in a life time, but we are still here. We are still together. And now more than ever we are present for each other. I don’t want to say it was Audrina that helped our relationship, because it was a variety of different things that have brought us closer, but she definitely helped us realize that our family is the most important thing in our lives and being happy together for her and for us was just as important.

I wanted to write this because although pregnancy is an incredible gift,  it can be one of the most challenging events a couple will go through. So my advice to anyone who is going through what I went through is don’t give up, try to see the light at the end of the tunnel and when you do run or waddle towards it. Talk to your spouse more, cuddle with him instead of the amazing Snoogle pillow, remember that he is probably just as scared sh*tless as you, and ladies don’t ever assume that he is a mind reader because I hate to break it to you, NONE of them are.

For valuable tips and resources from pregnancy and beyond visit www.thebabyandchild.com

 

 

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One response to “I hate to break it to ya…

  1. […] It get’s a bunch of likes and a couple moms repost as if secretly hoping hubs will see it and have an epiphany. Ladies, instead of posting this on Facebook post it on every wall in your home! Remember, men are not mind readers! (Read I hate to break it to ya…) […]

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